


dive into you

by flowerheeseung



Category: ENHYPEN (Band), I-LAND (Korea TV)
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, Fluff, I hope atleast, Love at First Sight, M/M, Only One Bed, Strangers to Lovers, as he should be, except for jungwon, finding each other, i guess?, jake is just korean for the sake of the story okay, jay being whipped for heeseung, jayseung cuties, jayseung needs so much more love, just boys in love ur honor, rich boy jay, the rest are kind of well not rich, they fall in love quite quickly lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-05
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:08:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26842633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerheeseung/pseuds/flowerheeseung
Summary: When Jay decides to run away, he meets a group of people.But more importantly, he meets Lee Heeseung.
Relationships: Kim Sunoo/Nishimura Riki | Ni-ki, Lee Heeseung/Park Jongseong | Jay, Park Sunghoon/Shim Jaeyoon | Jake
Comments: 41
Kudos: 174





	1. chapter one

Jay Park hated his life, well, maybe hated was a strong word. He _disliked_ his life, let’s put it that way. To some, Jay had the life people dream about, being the son of the CEO of one of the most influential businesses in Seoul, he never had to worry about money. He was always being pampered, being an only child and all, went to the most elite schools and had the most expensive items one could ask for.

But Jay wasn’t happy. Despite all of the luxury he lived with, he was constantly in the spotlight. Needing to take over the business once his father retired was weighing on him, since he didn’t have the slightest of interest in taking over. He had to attend fancy business parties where if he was even seen slouching around it would most likely make the cover of a tabloid the next morning. Jay just wanted a normal life as an 18 year old, he wanted to goof off with his friends and not care if there were cameras around. But it seemed like that wasn’t what life had in store for him.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

Jay’s father had another party that night. He told Jay that this was the most important meeting for his company, and that he had to be on his best behavior tonight. Jay could only nod and say ‘yes, father’. The servants of the household quickly styled him in one of his finest suits, one that Jay particularly hated, it constricted his movements too much and he felt like a robot walking in it. Looking in the mirror it seemed that that wasn’t a too far off comparison. They styled his hair in a way that made him look older than he was, and Jay had to resist the urge to run his hand through it and mess it up, but he knew he would probably never hear the end of it if he did.

The servants told him that they were ready and that he could make his way to the dining hall downstairs. They left his room and Jay was left alone with only his reflection staring back at him in the mirror. He let out a sigh and straightened himself, ready to meet people which he probably won’t remember by tomorrow morning anyways. _Come on Jay, just one more day._

The evening went by as slow as ever. Jay stood by the food just sipping on his drink, waiting for his father to introduce more people to him but it seemed that he was busy on the other side of the room to even mind his son.

He contemplated taking another piece of cake when a voice interrupted him. He quickly fixed his posture and turned around with his business smile, as he liked to call it, to be met with one of his father’s biggest shareholders in the company.

He had met the woman before, the latter always stepping too close and invading his personal space, but since the woman was important to his father’s company he had never dared to say anything about it. It seemed like the woman hadn’t changed, since she was already standing way too close for Jay’s comfort. “Jay was it? How long ago was it since I last saw you? You’ve grown up so well already.” The woman gushed as she laid a hand on Jay’s shoulder. To say he was uncomfortable was an understatement.

He shot her a smile and said “Ah yes, Miss Son was it? Nice to meet you again, I’m really sorry but it seems like my father needs me over there.” His father hadn’t even glanced at his direction, but Jay didn’t want to be here any longer.

He began walking away from the table, but it seemed like the woman wasn’t done talking to him yet, as she began pulling on Jay’s arm. Being in a crowded room full of people, and being pulled at made Jay lose his balance, and before he knew it the drink he was holding tipped over, right on Miss Son’s dress. Jay was frozen in fear, _what had he done?_

The rest of the guests all stilled their movements, staring in shock at Jay. Miss Son was boiling with anger he could tell, and before he could even think about apologizing he heard the booming voice of his father, yelling his name from across the room. Jay knew this was it for him, Miss Son probably wanted to take back all of her shares from the company, which would result in Jay’s father losing a big portion of his assets. In that moment, Jay had decided he didn’t want this anymore, he didn’t want to live scared of his father, scared about making small mistakes, mistakes that any 18 year old would make.

So, he ran.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jay dashed up the stairs, running as fast as he could in this god awful suit. He barged into his room and quickly changed into sweatpants and his favorite hoodie, he put on a beanie as well for good measure, since he didn’t want anyone to recognize him. He grabbed his phone and wallet, and nothing else, wanting to leave all of his items behind, wanting to leave this _life_ behind.

He opened his window and made the small jump on top of the garage roof, he used to take this route a lot when he was younger, to sneak out when his father didn’t allow him to play with his friends. On top of the garage roof, he jumped off, swiftly landing on his feet before taking off to the nearest bus station, he had never taken a bus in his life but he figured there had to be a first for anything right?

He had to wait for a while until the first bus appeared, he decided he would get on, not knowing where he wanted to go anyways. He paid for a ticket, the bus driver asking him how far he wanted to go.

“As far away as possible, please.” 

\----------------------------------------------------

Okay, so maybe Jay hadn’t thought this through. Here he was, at the end of the bus line, the driver taking his statement of as far away as possible quite literally, since Jay had never seen this side of Seoul before. The houses looked…..worn down, to say the least, people were yelling, shouting words he knew he could never even think of saying in his house. He thanked the driver reluctantly and stepped out of the bus, looking around him he thought to himself _what am I doing?_

But he figured there was no turning back now, if he would he would probably have to face his father’s outburst and knowing that, he shook his head and made his way down the street.

Jay felt as if he had been walking for hours already when he felt his stomach growling. Right, he had also forgotten to take any food with him. He hadn’t seen a single convenience store in the time he was walking around so he would most likely have to ask someone.

He turned the corner when he saw what must be a skate park, there were a bunch of people his age hanging around, some on skateboards and some opting to sit next to the halfpipes. He must’ve been standing there for quite a bit, staring like an idiot, because one of the people sitting on the ground called out to him.

”Hey you! Are you planning on standing there forever?” The rest of the small group snickered at the remark. He quickly snapped out of his state and hesitantly began making his way over to the group, surely they must know some place where he could get something to eat right? As he approached he heard some whistles coming from the group

“Damn boys, look at this one, don’t think he’s from here now are you?” A boy called out, the boy seemed to be younger than him, wearing a tattered flannel and some loose sweatpants, balancing his skateboard under his feet.

“Yah Jake, have some manners will you.” Someone threw a can at said boy, Jake he now assumed, and the two of them quickly began bickering, _they seemed close_ , Jay thought.

“Hey, are you okay? You look quite pale.” He hadn’t even realized someone approached him, startled, he turned around to face whoever asked him the question.

The boy was wearing similar clothes as Jay was, but the former’s seemed to be in a worse state than his own, the other boy was also wearing a beanie, but Jay could see dark hair peeking out from underneath it. The boy had brown doe eyes and a pointed nose. _Cute_ , Jay thought.

He had once again been staring without answering his question so he said “Y-yeah, I’m fine, well not really actually, do you know a store nearby where I could get some food?”

The other boy gave him a once over, which made Jay feel incredibly self conscious, and said “Here you can have some of ours, no need to buy anything.” The boy didn’t wait for Jay to reply, tugging Jay with him to the rest of his group.

“Yah hyung who have you taken in now?” One of the boys asked, everyone in the group staring at him expectantly, waiting for him to introduce himself. _Surely they wouldn’t know him right?_

He didn’t want to take the risk, not wanting to have anything tied to him, he decided he would use his Korean name instead. “Ah, hey everyone, my name is Jongseong, Park Jongseong.”

He wasn’t sure what to do next, so he turned to the boy who had taken him over here, and noticed the boy was still holding onto his arm.

When the other boy noticed he quickly let go, seemingly embarrassed, he scratched his throat and introduced the rest of the group. “The one who called out to you earlier, very rudely may I add,” he spoke a bit louder so that the boy in question could hear him “That’s Jake, and the one he was bickering with is Sunghoon, they’re always fighting so don’t mind them.”

He quickly went on to introduce the two others, Sunoo being the boy who indirectly asked him to introduce himself, and Niki being the one who was currently clinging on to Sunoo like his life depended on it.

Jay realized the boy standing next to him hadn’t introduced himself at all, so he nudged him and asked “And you? What’s your name?” The boy looked startled, as if he was shocked someone asked him for his name first. He was still looking at Jay when he spoke.

“It’s Heeseung, Lee Heeseung.”


	2. chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay gets to know the group.
> 
> He gets to know Heeseung.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for the sake of this story Jake is born in Korea okay sdksdksd

Jay sat down with everyone after being introduced to the group. He couldn’t even wipe the dirt off his hands before someone yelled at him again.

“Hey but Jongseong-hyung, I was right, right? You must not be from here.” It was Jake again, who now stood closer to the group, skateboard in hand. It seemed like Sunghoon and him had finished bickering, because the former now had his arm slung around Jake’s shoulders. _Hm_ , Jay thought, _I wonder if they’re together._

He was quickly pulled out of his thoughts by seeing ten eyes all focused on him, waiting for his answer. “Ah, no, no I’m not, I guess? I am from Seoul though.” He hoped they wouldn’t ask further. He hadn’t thought about people interacting with him, asking where he was from, so he hadn’t even thought about making up a believable story.

“Yeah okay, from Seoul, but _where_ in Seoul hyung?” _Shit._ Sunoo was looking at him expectantly, still having Niki wrapped around his arm.

“Yah what is this? An interrogation jeez, the boy just met all of you. Jongseong don’t mind them, you don’t have to share anything you don’t want to.” Heeseung reassured him.

“Yeah, Niki didn’t tell you where he was from either, and you didn’t question him at all Sunoo?” Sunghoon’s mocking tone didn’t go by unnoticed, and this time he was the one that got a can directed at his head.

 _Ah that’s right,_ Jay thought. “Hyung, did you maybe have some food? I don’t think me or my stomach will last long without some.” He asked Heeseung, who then quickly and went on to grab something from his backpack.

“Here you go.” Heeseung handed him a sandwich, something Jay probably wouldn’t go for if this was a normal situation, but it’s not, so he took it gratefully.

“Thanks, hyung.” He got a small smile in return, and hastily munched down the sandwich.

\----------------------------------------------------------------

After he was done eating, he noticed the sun quickly starting to set, and the rest of the people in the skatepark went their own ways after saying goodbye to each other. It seemed like the group of five also started to pack up, so Jay quickly stood up as well, trying to make it seem like he had somewhere to go, but honestly, he didn’t know what to do next. He hadn’t thought this far ahead at all, heck he hadn’t even thought an hour ahead, so he had no clue where to stay the night. _Would it be rude to ask one of them? I hardly know them though, they could very well be serial killers or something._ It seemed like his dilemma didn’t go by unnoticed, because Heeseung was once again standing in front of him, looking at him with concern in his eyes.

“Hey, you don’t have a place to stay do you?” Jay snapped his head up, startled by the sudden question.

“Uh, y-yes of course I do!” He nervously chuckled, but the older tsked and said, “Yeah I heard that one before, right Niki?” The younger boy scoffed and went on to say “We’re leaving hyungs, bye~” The boy tugged Sunoo with him, who was still saying goodbye to Sunghoon and Jake, and waved a quick goodbye to Heeseung and Jay before disappearing around the corner.

“Do they uh, do they live together?” Jay asked hesitantly, he didn’t know why but he felt like he wasn’t supposed to ask for some reason.

“Ah that, that is quite a long story, maybe they’ll tell it to you someday. But don’t change the topic! You _don’t_ have anywhere to stay, right?” Heeseung shot him a stern look, one that had Jay feeling compelled to tell the truth.

“Y-yeah, I mean, no I don’t…” He was embarrassed, he always had somewhere to stay. If it wasn’t at home it was with one of his friends, but he doesn’t think he could call them right now as they would probably tell his father where he was, _maybe he could ask Ju-_

“You can stay at my place for tonight, if you want? I know we just met like a couple of hours ago but I promise I’m not a serial killer or anything.” 

Jay was once again startled, he really _didn’t_ know Heeseung at all, but the older boy had been nothing but nice and generous to him since they met, and Jay _did_ need somewhere to sleep. So he said, “Please hyung, I’d like that.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------

They began walking to Heeseung’s place, Jay feeling a bit awkward since he didn’t know what to say, he decided to break the ice by asking, “So hyung, have you and the rest been friends for a long time?”

The older kicked a pebble off the curb when he spoke, “Yeah I guess we have? We all come from different places but Sunghoon and I basically grew up together. We met Sunoo a couple of years back at the same skatepark actually,” he chuckled and continued, “and Jake and Niki basically came out of nowhere, kind of like you I guess.”

He turned to face Jay, who was staring at Heeseung, listening intently to his story, when he quickly turned his head around to face forward again once he had been caught staring. Jay coughed, but could already feel his ears warm up.

“A-ah I see! So you all must be close then?” He asked once again, trying not to stare at Heeseung’s side profile this time.

“Yeah we are, well some of us a little _closer_ to some than others, if you catch my drift.” _Ah so I was right,_ Jay thought.

“Are they like….you know... _together_ together?” He tentatively asked, once again he felt like he wasn’t supposed to ask.

“Well, they dance around each other a lot, and they don’t like to put labels on anything, but they are aware of their feelings yeah.” Jay hummed and stared ahead of him, not wanting to say anything since he felt like that wasn’t his place.

“That’s not a problem for you though, right?” Heeseung said, and Jay felt him looking at him, so he shook his head and waved his hands, “No! No oh my god no of course not! I uh...I like boys as well so no, no problem here at all.” He quietly said the last part, not really sure why he said it at all, he wasn’t even out to his father, and had only told one of his closest friends, so he wasn’t sure what compelled him to tell Heeseung, but he felt like he could share this with him. He felt like the older wouldn’t judge him, or make fun of him. “Ah okay, that’s good then!”

They continued to walk in silence until Heeseung stopped and stuck his thumb out at the direction of a worn out looking house. “This is me, I know it’s not much but hey, it’s home to me.” Jay decided to stop staring and to follow Heeseung inside the house. The inside of the house looked much better than the outside, the older must have a good sense of interior design because the house was decorated so homely, pictures adorned the walls and Jay saw that a lot of them were of Heeseung and the group, most of them being polaroid pictures.

He noticed one where they all looked particularly happy, Heeseung being the one taking the picture, Jake was spread out across Sunghoon’s lap, holding up a peace sign while the latter looked at Jake with the most fond look Jay had ever seen. Sunoo had both arms wrapped around Niki’s shoulders, both of them smiling so bright, it made Jay smile as well. He realized he had been looking at the pictures for what seemed to be way too long, because Heeseung was nowhere to be found.

“Hyung?” Jay quietly yelled, when he heard Heeseung yell from upstairs, “I’m here!” Jay made his way up the stairs, and entered what seemed to be a bedroom, where he found Heeseung rummaging through one of the closets.

“Hyung, what are you doing?” He asked, confused. “Ah I thought I had a spare futon and blanket somewhere, but I think I might’ve given them to Sunoo.” He sheepishly said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Oh that’s no problem I’ll just sleep on the-”

 _Oh,_ he realized he hadn’t seen a couch in the living room at all.

“Yeah I don’t uh...have a uh….couch or something, I usually hang out at other people’s places or just lay in bed so I never had the need for it….” Heeseung was getting redder by the minute, and Jay could feel that he was as well.

“I mean I-I don’t mind…” Jay was fidgeting with the strings on his hoodie, not sure what came over him, he didn’t even sleep in one bed with his friends, but he said he didn’t _mind_ it? He couldn’t beat himself up about it more, because Heeseung was already giving him a set of sleepwear, “I hope they fit, the pants are a little long on me so they’ll probably fit you.” He wasn’t that much shorter than Heeseung, but he thanked him and went into the bathroom to change.

\----------------------------------------------------------------

He looked at himself in the bathroom mirror and all but gasped at his reflection. He looked as pale as a ghost, _Heeseung didn’t exaggerate when he said that_ , he thought. He quickly changed into the sleepwear the older had given him, pleased to see that it fit him quite well. The shirt he was wearing had a pleasant smell to it, something like an ocean breeze, and he realized that that was just Heeseung’s smell. He looked in the mirror again and saw that he was sniffing the shirt like some sort of creep, he quickly splashed some water over his face and went out to the bedroom again. 

He saw that Heeseung was already laying in bed, which made this even more awkward, so he said “This is awkward.” Heeseung turned to look at him, chuckled, and said, “You’re _making_ this awkward, now come on I’m tired.” The older scooted over a bit so that Jay had more room, to which Jay quickly padded over to the bed, and slowly got under the covers.

They were just laying side by side for a moment, Jay really not knowing how to act, when Heeseung sighed and said, “You know, I took Jake in like this as well,” at that, Jay turned around to face him, feeling like he wanted to look at the older everytime he was talking.

He noticed how the light coming from the street lanterns cast a glow over the older, highlighting his features. Jay could see the arch of Heeseung’s eyebrows, down to the slope of his nose to his lips. He let himself wonder for a minute, just a minute, how it would feel like if-

Heeseung didn’t wait for the younger to respond before continuing his story, “He ran away from home, because his parents didn’t approve of him liking boys, absolutely ridiculous,” he said, looking like he was getting angry before he let out a deep breath and continued, “I saw him one day, strolling around on the streets, looking like a sad lost puppy, when I approached him. I asked him if he was okay and he just broke down. I tried to calm him down but he was so upset that I decided to take him here as well. I introduced him to Sunghoon and well, you saw how they were.”

Heeseung smiled fondly, and seeing that made Jay have a soft smile on his face as well.

“And you, hyung? What’s your story?” Once again, Heeseung seemed startled that someone asked something about him.

“Ah my story? Well, I was actually born here in the suburbs, my uh- my mom died giving birth to me,” Jay immediately felt bad for asking, he was about to apologize when Heeseung continued, “and well, my dad decided it was a good idea to blame me for what happened to her, he drank a lot and was always out, and one day well….he uh didn’t...he didn’t come back.”

Heeseung tried to avoid Jay’s eyes, but this time Jay did manage to apologize, “I’m sorry hyung really, I probably shouldn’t have asked.” Heeseung turned on his side to face Jay, and was suddenly a lot closer than he had anticipated. He felt his stomach do a weird twist at seeing Heeseung’s face so up close. _He looked absolutely stunning._

“Don’t worry, most people don’t ask so it’s nice to have someone listening once in a while.” Heeseung smiled softly at him, making his stomach churn again. _What was happening to him?_

He decided to ignore the feeling, and instead opted to ask, “Hyung, don’t you want to leave here then? I don’t know, maybe...go to the city?” He hesitantly asked.

Heeseung tsked, rolling on his back again, something Jay wished he hadn’t done, and responded, “The city? No thanks, people that live there only care about themselves. They don’t care for us, that live here in the suburbs and have to find ways to get by, no they only care about themselves and their fancy clothes and fancy parties. We might not have much here but I think, no I _know_ , that I’m happier here.”

Jay felt a pang in his heart, he knew the older was indirectly talking about him, and he also knew that he was right. Before coming here he had never paid any attention to the suburbs, heck he hadn’t even been here once. And he knows that his father’s company has a lot of connections with the city council, he could’ve easily helped the people here, but he had never paid any attention either. Jay wanted to throw up, a tiny voice in his head saying,

_Like father, like son._

_“_ Sorry the guys always tell me that I’m ranting when asked about the city,” Heeseung laughed and asked, “but tell me about you, if you want of course.” He asked with such a gentle voice, that Jay felt like he couldn’t avoid it. “I uh-I ran away as well.” He decided to leave it at that. He couldn’t possibly tell Heeseung that he was one of the people he so despised, he just couldn’t.

Heeseung seemed to understand that he didn’t want to talk about it further so he said, “Okay, good night, Jongseong-ah.” _Right, he hadn’t been honest with him since the start._ Jay muttered out a “Goodnight, hyung.” before turning around and trying to get some shut eye.

After laying in bed for what must’ve been 15 minutes, which felt like hours to Jay, he realized he couldn’t sleep and turned on his back to stare at the ceiling. He heard the older boy’s soft breaths, signalling that he had fallen asleep. Jay dared to take a peek at the older, and was greeted with the sight of Heeseung facing his way. Jay slowly turned around and faced him, staring at him in a way that must look creepy to anyone spectating. He traced the older boy's features with his eyes, not wanting to move too much in fear of waking him up. At that moment he decided he didn’t want to be someone Heeseung despised, he wanted to be close to the older boy, _closer._ He took one look at the brown haired boy’s face again and softly spoke,

_“I’ll show you the real me someday, hyung.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter two! y'all can probably guess who Jay's closest friend is hehehe.
> 
> also i might do a jakehoon & sunki spin off once i finish this! it would basically be their backstory and how they came to be~ let me know if you'd like that!!
> 
> thanks for reading :3


	3. chapter three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jay and Heeseung both realize something.

Jay woke up, feeling quite disoriënted.

He had never been a morning person so he always had to take some time to wake up. Eyes still closed, he began stretching out his limbs. He didn’t get far however, since he felt something on his stomach. He opened his eyes begrudgingly, already squinting because of the morning light, when he saw that the thing on his stomach was an arm, you know, a human one.

His eyes shot open and he looked over to his left side, where a still sleeping Heeseung had tucked himself away in Jay’s side. The older had his arm over his stomach, and one of his legs thrown on Jay’s own. Jay could feel the heat rushing to his cheeks.

 _No way in hell that this is happening to me,_ Jay thought.

He scratched his throat and decided he had to wake the older up. He timidly shook the other, whispering a quiet “Hyung?”

Heeseung must’ve heard him, because he grunted and said, “Five more minutes, Jongseong-ah.”

Jay almost choked on his spit, hearing the older say his name, albeit his Korean name, with his scratchy morning voice made his heart do the weird things it did last night again. The older however, seemed to realize who he was talking to because he slowly opened his eyes, only to be met with Jay’s distraught face.

Heeseung practically jumped out of the bed, “Ah-ah oh my god Jongseong-ah I’m so sorry that must’ve been so uncomfortable I’m so so sorry-” The older stuttered out.

Jay tried to calm him down, saying, “No no it’s fine hyung really I-” He was about to say he didn’t mind it _again_ , but he didn’t, Heeseung must’ve felt uncomfortable himself right? Seeing as how he reacted, Jay thought that must be the case.

Heeseung was still panicking it seemed. He hurriedly grabbed some clothes out of the closet and muttered that he was going to go shower. He didn’t even meet Jay’s eyes when he said it.

The older dashed out of the room and Jay was left alone with his thoughts. He thought about where to go from here, would he go back to his father? Maybe they could work it out somehow, ask his father to get someone else to take over the company?

Jay ruffled his hair, annoyed by the situation, he grabbed his phone from his sweatpants. He was met with countless missed calls from his father and text messages that were mostly in all caps. He scrolled down his notifications to see that Jungwon had called a couple of times as well. Jay sighed.

Jungwon was his best friend, although Jay was older than him, they met at school and were practically inseparable ever since. Jungwon really was like Jay’s younger brother, and they spend almost every day together, so it did feel bad to keep him in the dark for so long.

Jay still heard the shower running, so he thought he would call Jungwon back, he _had_ really missed the younger. He clicked on the call button and waited for the other line to pick up.

“Yah Jay hyung!!” Jay smiled almost instantly, the high pitched voice of his best friend ringing through the speakers. “Yah where have you been hyung? If you want to run away at least let me know where you going~” The younger whined.

Jay chuckled and said, “Jungwon-ah, did you miss hyung that much?”

The younger scoffed and threateningly said, “I’m going to hang up if you’re being like this!” But it just sounded cute when Jungwon said it.

“Okay okay, I’ll stop! But _I_ can at least own up to the fact that I missed you, and I’m sorry for disappearing like that, it just...I don’t know, got too much you know?” Jay sighed.

“Yeah I get it hyung, you have a lot on your plate. But are you at least somewhere safe? You’re not out in a ditch somewhere right?” Jay could almost hear the concern in the younger's voice.

“Yah do you really think I would sleep in a ditch? I’m somewhere save Jungwon-ah, don’t worry about it,” He heard the shower turn off and quickly added, “Jungwonnie I have to go again okay? Please don’t tell my father you spoke to me, and I’ll call you when I’m coming back!” 

“Ah okay hyung, please stay safe, I love you!” Jay smiled, the younger had a habit of saying that, and Jay always thought it was annoying.

But he figured he would humor the younger for once and said, “I love you too, Jungwon-ah.” He could hear the younger spluttering, before quickly hanging up.

Just in time, because Heeseung came into the room again, seemingly calmed down from his fit earlier. His hair was still damp and was stuck to his forehead. He looked way younger like this, like he didn’t have to face the world on his own.

Jay caught himself staring this time, and looked away. The older scratched his throat as well and said, “You can shower too if you’d like, you can borrow some of my clothes if you want..” He trailed off.

Jay agreed, to which Heeseung handed him a sweater and sweatpants as well, which didn’t look too different to what Jay was wearing yesterday. He thanked the older and made his way over to the bathroom.

Once the door was closed Heeseung sighed. He didn’t want to, but he had overheard a bit of the phone call.

_I love you too, Jungwon-ah?_

\-------------------------------------------------------------

When Jay got out of the shower and was done getting ready, Heeseung suggested that they met up with the others to eat breakfast saying, “I usually eat breakfast with them, Sunoo’s parents own a convenience store so we usually meet up there.”

Jay nodded, and they both made their way downstairs.

The walk to the convenience store was silent. Jay didn’t know if this was what people called an ‘awkward silence’, since he always had Jungwon around, it really never _was_ silent. They continued making their way to the store when Heeseung broke the silence saying, “Who’s Jungwon?”

Jay almost tripped over nothing, startled, he said “W-what?”

Heeseung looked almost quilty, “I-I didn’t mean to but I overheard your conversation earlier on the phone and you were talking to a Jungwon and you know….saying ‘I love you’.” He quietly said the last part, but since they were walking so close, Jay heard anyway.

“Ah he’s just a friend! He was just worried about me since I didn’t say where I was going and he always says I love you as a joke and I thought I would say it back so-” His rambling got interrupted by laughter, and when he looked over he found that Heeseung was laughing, almost doubling over with his eyes squinted.

Jay smiled, seeing him laugh like this made him look so carefree.

“Okay okay I get it! I believe you don’t worry.” He was still sniffling a bit, but he looked at Jay and they were just staring at each other for a while. Heeseung seemed to snap out of it first, pointing forward.

“The uh-store is right there.” He said and quickly began walking.

Jay shook his head and followed after the older.

When they arrived at the store, the rest was already there. It seemed like Sunghoon and Jake were bickering again, standing by the display of sandwiches, and Niki and Sunoo were talking together, the latter leaning over the counter noticed them walking in first.

“Yah Heeseung-hyung, why are you so late? You’re usually the first one here.” Sunoo said, looking at the two oldest with a sly smile on his face.

Heeseung smiled and ruffled the boys’ hair, while also making his way over to the display where Sunghoon and Jake were standing. Jay wasn’t sure what to do, so he opted to talk with the two youngest.

“Jongseong hyung, did you sleep at Heeseung hyung’s house tonight?” Niki said, to which Sunoo punched him on the shoulder.

“Yah, that’s not any of your business!” Sunoo tsked.

“Y-yeah I did,” Jay hesitantly confessed, “why, is that bad?”

Sunoo and Niki looked at each other, seemingly shocked, before Sunoo spoke, “Well it’s just, the only time one of us has ever been to hyung’s house was when he took Jake in, and that was because he looked like a kicked puppy,” Sunoo snickered before continuing, “He never lets any of us go to his house, that’s all.”

Jay looked over to where Heeseung was standing, he seemed to now also be bickering with the duo, and Jay could vaguely hear that the conversation was about how Jake thought tuna sandwiches were absolutely disgusting, while Sunghoon loved them. Heeseung laughed at the other two before making eye contact with Jay, he smiled at him and gave him a wave, to which Jay tentatively waved back.

Jay barely knew the older, but it seemed like they knew each other forever.

\-----------------------------------------------------------

They had all finished their food, and were now just lounging around the store. Heeseung and Jay were looking through the aisles together, when Jay asked, “Hyung, do you maybe….want to see the city with me?” He knew this was a bold move, but he so badly wanted to show Heeseung that not every part of the city was as bad as he thought it was.

Heeseung looked at him, hesitantly, before asking, “Why all of a sudden?”

“I don’t know it seemed like it would be fun! You know...just uh….just the two of us.” Jay said, which was partially true, it _would_ be nice to spend some more time with Heeseung alone.

The older looked at Jay and sighed, “Fine, but not too long!”

Jay was ecstatic, he hurriedly pulled the older out of the store, shouting a quick goodbye to the rest, who all seemed confused, before going to the nearest bus stop. Jay took a quick glance at Heeseung while waiting for the bus, but the older was already staring at him, and instead of looking away, he simply gave Jay a soft smile, the same smile that he gave him when they were talking last night.

And this time, Jay didn’t fight the feeling in his stomach.

\------------------------------------------------------------

The bus ride went by fairly quickly, Jay pointing out different things along the way, Heeseung listening attentively, but you wouldn’t be wrong if you said he was staring at Jay’s face most of the time.

They made it to their stop and went off the bus, the stop was right in the bustling city, Heeseung almost immediately looked uncomfortable, “Why is it so busy here, I feel like I can barely walk before running into someone.”

Jay was busy tugging his beanie farther over his head, not wanting to be recognized at all. Hearing what Heeseung said, he decided to be bold for once and grabbed the other’s hand, intertwining their fingers, “Just so I don’t lose you in the crowd.” 

Heeseung stared at their hands before looking up at Jay. He smiled at him, squeezing his hand a little, “Okay then, lead the way.”

They went to Myeongdong first, looking through the shops and trying food from the food stalls. It seemed like Heeseung didn’t particularly enjoy the busy streets, so Jay took him to Lotte World next. They went on rides and played games, and Jay even tried his hand at winning a plushie, for _himself_ , of course.

Luck wasn’t on his side, since he didn’t win anything. He had his back turned away from the game for one second, and the bell rang, signalling a winner. He turned back around and there Heeseung stood, with a giant brown teddy bear in his hands. He seemed bashful, but Jay didn’t get the chance to ask how in the hell he did that, before the teddy bear was thrusted in his arms.

Heeseung tugged on his arm, seemingly embarrassed, if his red face indicated anything. Jay smiled and let out a quick, “Thank you hyung.”, before cuddling the bear tightly.

It was getting late already, but Jay still had one thing to show him. They were walking side by side, Jay holding the teddy bear with one hand, and Heeseung’s hand in the other. They swayed their hands together, probably looking like high schoolers with the way they were grinning at the floor.

“Ah hyung we’re here!” Jay tugged Heeseung over to the railing, standing on the Han River bridge. It looked beautiful, the lights were all lit up across the bridge, making different patterns. Jay snuck a glance at Heeseung, who was looking in awe at the water.

“It’s pretty here Jongseong-ah.” He said, voice quiet.

“Yeah, yeah it is hyung.” Jay answered back, but his eyes were on Heeseung. The older looked stunning illuminated by the lights, and the feeling in his stomach returned, but this time Jay accepted it wholeheartedly.

Heeseung looked over at Jay, who had fallen quiet, before noticing that he was already looking at him. The older gulped, they were so close. It seemed like Jay noticed as well, because without thinking, he leaned forward, teddy bear still squished in between them when Heeseung leaned in as well.

They were so so close, Jay could feel the other’s breath fanning his face. He was about to lean in completely when-

_“Jay hyung?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hhhh


	4. chapter four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And despite all of his efforts, Jay loses him.

Jay jumped backwards, being used to his Korean name now, he frantically looked around for the source of the voice, when he saw him.

Jungwon was standing a couple of steps away, squinting to see if it really was Jay, before his face brightened and he basically began sprinting towards him, “Jay hyung it is you! You said you would tell me if you came back.” The younger boy whined, engulfing Jay in a hug.

Jay was panicking, he hadn’t thought he would come across anyone he knew, let alone his best friend. Standing there frozen, Jungwon stepped back and looked at Jay, confused.

“Hyung what is it? Why are you so pale? Oh! Who’s this hyung?” Jungwon questioned

Right. Heeseung was standing right behind him. Jay didn’t have the guts to turn around, the older boy must be confused why someone called him Jay instead of Jongseong.

Jungwon, being the polite and kind boy he is, started to introduce himself to Heeseung. He stuck out his hand and said, “Hello! I’m Yang Jungwon, Jay hyung’s self proclaimed best friend, are you a friend as well? I’ve never seen you before?”

It was at that moment that Jay knew he had to turn around, so he did. The confusion on Heeseung’s face was clear, even in the hue of the bridge lights. He looked at Jungwon, and then at Jay and said, “ _ Jay?  _ What do you mean?”

It wasn’t clear if the question was directed to Jungwon or himself, but Jay knew he had to explain, before Heeseung got the wrong idea. “Hyung I-I...maybe I haven’t been completely honest with you, but I’ll explain, okay?” Jay pleaded.

“Yah hyung, what’s going on? Your father has been worried sick about you, you know? He isn’t even angry anymore, just worried, so can you please come home?” Jungwon tugged on Jay’s sleeve, but his eyes were focused on Heeseung.

“Jongseong-ah, can you  _ please _ explain what’s going on?” Heeseung sounded frustrated, he felt like he was being left in the dark. He hated that feeling.

“Okay hyung I..I don’t really use the name Jongseong, I mean it’s still my name! Just not one I’m really known under…” Jay knew what the older was going to ask next, and he wasn’t prepared to answer the question, at all.

“Okay….why wouldn’t you tell me your real name then?” Heeseung crossed his arms, clearly getting agitated.

“I-I uh, didn’t want you to recognize me, or my name,” He knew he had to come clean about everything now, “my father he uhm...is the CEO of Park Enterprises, and I know how much you hate the city and its people, and I was scared you were going to think of me the same way if you knew.” It wasn’t why he had told him his Korean name at first, but it did come to that when he began to know the older.

Heeseung scoffed, he looked out at the river for a bit, which felt like hours for Jay, when he turned back to look Jay straight in the eyes and said, “So that’s why you wanted to show me the city? To make  _ yourself  _ feel better?” The older chuckled before continuing, “I can’t believe you lied to me like that, you think I immediately have a prejudice against anyone that’s from the city? If you really thought you were a good person, you wouldn’t have to lie,  _ Jay _ .”

The older spat out his name with so much venom, Jay felt like he never wanted to use it again, or hear it from the older’s mouth ever again. When he saw Heeseung turning around, he quickly grabbed his hand with his own, still clutching the teddy bear. “Hyung please, can’t we just talk about it?” Jay was getting desperate at this point.

The older looked at Jay’s hand on his own, and shrugged it off. “There’s nothing to talk about.” Hand now free, Heeseung turned around completely, and Jay was too frozen in shock to go after him.

Earlier that day he had told the older that he didn’t want to lose him in the crowd, but now, seeing Heeseung’s bright yellow colored beanie disappear further and further he realized. Losing all grip in his hands, the teddy bear that the older had so sweetly won for him fell on the cold ground.

Jay didn’t lose him, he made him leave all on his own.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

Seeing Jay in that dejected state, Jungwon quickly shook him to get him out of his trance. “Yah hyung, what-what was that,  _ who  _ was that?”

Jay didn’t feel like explaining, thinking that if he even began talking about Heeseung he would get choked up, so instead he opted for, “Just a friend, Jungwon-ah.”

Jungwon looked at him skeptically, he did always see right through him, but luckily he didn’t press further. “If you say so hyung, are you going home today? I meant what I said you know, your father really is worried rather than mad.”

Jay looked at the spot where Heeseung just stood, before noticing the teddy bear on the ground. He bent down to pick it up, dusting it off before shooting Jungwon a quick smile and saying, “Yeah Jungwon-ah, let’s go home.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------

Jay and Jungwon took a cab to Jay’s house, where Jay assured Jungwon he was okay on his own. The younger looked at him concerned, “If there’s anything at all call me okay hyung?”

Jay smiled at the younger before ruffling his hair, “Of course Jungwonnie, get home safely okay?” He closed the cab door and watched it drive away before turning around.

He looked at the gates to his house, it felt so foreign. He punched in the code and the gates opened. Walking up the driveway he wondered if his father really was worried, and that maybe he shouldn’t have come home.

He opened the front door and was greeted with the silence of his living room, it hadn’t changed at all. He sighed, when he heard a door closing and someone rushing down the stairs. He turned around, only to be met with his father. He looked like he hadn’t slept for days, his hair was disheveled and his tie askew.

They stood like that for a bit, before his father strided over to him and hugged him. Jay was shocked, he couldn’t remember the last time his father hugged him, it must’ve been when he was just a kid.

“I missed you, son.” His father breathed out, hugging him tighter. Jay sighed, this feeling was nice. He reluctantly hugged his father back before whispering,

“I missed you too, dad.”

\---------------------------------------------------------

Jay had a long talk with his father, the two of them sitting down in the living room.

“Where have you been Jay-ah? Why didn’t you answer any of my calls or messages?” His father asked.

“I couldn’t stay here anymore dad, it just-it just got too much that night, so I ran,” He explained, “I-I went to the suburbs.” He tilted his head up as he said that, wanting to see the expression on his father’s face.

The look on his father’s face wasn’t angry, more so concerned. “Why did you go there Jay-ah? Don’t you know how dangerous it is there? How dangerous the people-”

Jay interrupted his father, already knowing what he was going to say, “It’s  _ not  _ dangerous dad, not at all, and the people there aren’t either. Have you ever even been there? It’s being looked at as dangerous because the people here in the city give it that name, without even talking to the people who live there, without  _ knowing _ how hard some of them have it!” He said, raising his voice.

He wasn’t going to sit here and let his father badmouth the people there, badmouth  _ his friends _ , badmouth  _ Heeseung _ . He never spoke against his father, and this clearly shocked him, as his father looked at him with wide eyes.

“I had a great time there, I met some lovely people who have gone through so so much. Their living environment could be way better if the city did something about it, if  _ you _ did something about it dad.” He pointed his finger at his father before continuing, “You’re expecting me to take over the company when I’ve seen what goes on out there, knowing you are doing nothing about it.”

Jay had to calm himself down a bit, he didn’t want to fight with his father, he just wanted to make this clear to him, “If you want me to take over the company dad, things have to change, right now.” 

He looked at his father, who seemed to be contemplating. He ran a hand through his already disheveled hair, before turning back to Jay.

“Okay son, tell me what has to change.”

\----------------------------------------------------------

He talked about a plan with his father for hours that night, the both of them agreeing that the company was going to work on the suburbs, to make it better for the people there. They also agreed that while his father was still CEO, Jay would be in charge of this project.

They set up a press conference for it, one where Jay would be speaking most of the time. It was the day of said press conference and Jay was nervous to say the least.

The servants were dressing him up again, and Jay felt a weird sense of deja vu, except this time Jay wore a suit that he felt comfortable in and his hair wasn’t styled to make him look ten years older.

Jay and his father left to go to the conference, it was the first time they went somewhere together, and although it wasn’t a typical father and son outing, Jay was still glad.

His father squeezed his leg before assuring him that it would go fine, Jay smiled. He hoped it would, and he didn’t know how, but he hoped  _ he  _ would be watching.

\-----------------------------------------------------------

When they stepped out of the car he was immediately blinded by lights. This was the first time Jay had actively participated in company matters, and it seemed like the tabloids didn’t waste a second. His father guided him through the mass, when Jay saw the daunting podium with a singular microphone in the middle.

He stepped on the podium, where his father took a seat to his right, and he saw more company staff sitting on the left. He gulped, he really had to do this. He took his place in front of the microphone and looked out in the crowd, it was filled with reporters and journalists who all had their microphone out, ready to ask questions.

“Hello everyone, thank you for coming, my name is Jay Park.”

Immediately camera shutters went off and the crowd began to yell out his name, wanting to get his attention. He cleared his throat and began speaking, “I am holding this press conference on behalf of Park Enterprises, and as head of the City Development Project. With this project Park Enterprises wishes to help the suburbs of Seoul, and personally help the growth of the people there. I will now take a few questions.”

This was the part he was most scared of, he didn’t know what questions people were going to ask, let alone know how to answer them. What if they thought the project was stupid?

Jay pointed at a man in front of the crowd, who asked, “Why the sudden interest in the suburbs? Park Enterprises never seemed to care much for anything outside of the city.”

Jay gulped, but answered calmly, “In the couple of days that I was...away, I stayed in the suburbs,” He could hear the hushed whispers already, “and I met a group of lovely people and saw first hand how hard people have it there in comparison to us who live in the city. I then had a realisation that the company didn’t do anything about it, and I wanted to change that.”

He felt relieved, that wasn’t so bad.

He then pointed to a woman a couple of rows back who asked, “Was there maybe a special someone there that helped change your mind?” The whispers got even louder, Jay could already see the headlines; ‘Son of  _ Park Enterprises CEO found love in the suburbs?’ _

But Jay didn’t care about the headlines, he smiled to himself before answering the question.

“Yes, yes there is.”

The camera shutters and yelling got even louder, if that was possible, when someone yelled out, “Who is she? Is she here?”

Jay scoffed, he cleared his throat again, which got the crowd a little quieter, before bending down to the microphone. “ _ He _ is someone very special to me,” The crowd audibly gasped, and he could hear his father gasp on his right as well. He paid them no mind before continuing, “He helped me out when I had nowhere to go, and he has taught me so many valuable lessons, without even knowing it himself.”

The crowd was yelling again to ask questions, but Jay knew he had to say this, right now, without getting interrupted, “I did something I’m not proud of when I was there, and I really hope he is watching this right now, because I’m sorry, Heeseung-hyung. I’m sorry I lied to you and I’m sorry I broke your trust. If you’d let me, I’d love to win it back again.”

He was getting choked up, he pictured the older again, the two of them laying in Heeseung’s bed, the older looking so ethereal under the street lantern lights. The brown haired boy looking at him with the softest eyes, smiling at him.

He looked at his father, who seemed shocked, to say the least. He looked back in the crowd at the reporters and paparazzi, when the first tear fell. He grabbed the microphone with shaking hands and with his voice breaking he said,

“That was all, thank you.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost at the end! the last chapter will probably go up at the end of this week since im swamped with schoolwork hhh
> 
> as always let me know what you think and thanks for reading! :3


	5. chapter five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Jay ran away, he didn't expect to find love.
> 
> He didn't expect to find Lee Heeseung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its still the 15th here so HAPPY HEESEUNG DAY <3333 oh how i love him  
> figured we'd finish this story on his birthday, symbolic right?

“ _That was all, thank you.”_

Jay ran off the stage after that, ignoring the shouts of his father and staff trying to stop him. He didn’t want anyone to see him crying, and seeing as the paparazzi was still around that was going to be hard.

He continued running, he was glad the conference was in the middle of the city, because he knew exactly where he needed to go. He dashed through the crowds, people cursing at him for bumping into them and he even almost got hit by a car while trying to cross the road. He apologized to the driver before coming to a halt.

He panted, putting his hands on his knees. The lights weren’t as bright at the Han River bridge this time, and while he knew it was because the sun was still out, it felt like it was because Heeseung wasn’t there with him.

He stood there, leaning on the railing for a while, before the tears came flowing down.

“Hyung.” Came a voice from behind him.

He turned around, only to see Jungwon’s face which seemed to mirror Jay’s own. “It’s okay hyung, you can let it all out with me.”

Hearing those words, Jay hugged the younger, sobbing into his shirt. Jungwon rubbed his back soothingly and said, “Let’s go home hyung, let’s talk.”

\----------------------------------------------------

After running away from Jongseong- or _Jay?_ Heeseung didn’t know anymore. He barely knew which way they came from, but he could still envision the bus stop which led to the suburbs.

He could feel the stares burning in his back from the crowd wherever he went, he knew he didn’t belong here, but they didn’t have to rub it in so much. Heeseung found the bus stop, to his surprise. He paid for the ticket and went to sit at the back of the bus.

He passed by the seats they sat at earlier, Heeseung swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat and walked past them. When he sat down he couldn’t help but let a tear fall. _Had he been too harsh on him? Should he have given him a chance to explain himself?_

He began beating himself up like this, but it was too late anyway. The bus doors closed and they took off, going back _home_.

The bus ride didn’t go by nearly as quick this time, Heeseung missed having Jongseong talk his head off about the city. He sighed, and got off the bus. He begrudgingly began walking home, but he figured he would pass by the skate park first. He had missed his friends, and could really use them right now.

When he got closer to the park, he could already hear Sunoo shrieking. He smiled and quickened his pace. He turned the corner and there they were, Niki was chasing Sunoo around the ramp, while Jake was practicing on his skateboard, Sunghoon cheering him on. Sunoo noticed him first, stopping abruptly and yelling, “Guys, they’re back!”

Heeseung felt a pang in his chest. _Right, he would have to explain._

“It’s just-it’s just me everyone.” Heeseung said, already seeing confused stares.

The others quickly noticed something was up with the eldest, and they all gathered together, Sunoo ushering Heeseung to the circle, “Yah hyung, what’s going on? Where’s Jongseong hyung?”

Having to explain what happened opened the floodgates, because tears began running down the olders face. The others were seemingly shocked, never having seen Heeseung cry, _ever_.

They tried calming him down, and Heeseung began telling them what happened. He told them about the fun day they had, and the pretty lights at the bridge. He decided to leave the part where they almost kissed out of it. He then told them about Jungwon, and how Jongseong had lied to them. _Well, he didn’t lie exactly, he just didn’t tell them the whole truth, which was lying, right?_

Jake scoffed when he had heard the whole story, “Yah, I can’t believe him, he better not show up here again.”

Sunghoon nudged him in the ribs, to which Jake doubled over. “Can you be any more insensitive, you can see how hyung feels about this.”

Jake looked at Heeseung, who looked like a kicked puppy this time, and apologetically said, “Ah, I’m sorry hyung.”

Heeseung smiled at him, and reassured him it was okay. He would be okay, he only needed his friends by his side.

_Right?_

\----------------------------------------------------

They had all decided to sleep over at Sunghoon’s that night, Heeseung being grateful that he wouldn’t have to be alone. He was sure he wouldn’t be able to sleep, his thoughts drifting off to Jongseong every second of the day.

They were all in the convenience store, Jake and Sunghoon bickering yet again about sandwich flavors. It all felt oddly familiar, but when Heeseung looked over at the counter this time, he only found Niki and Sunoo talking.

He sighed and was about to tell the others he was going for a walk to clear his head, when Sunoo yelled. Shocked, the oldest ran to the counter, frantically asking him what happened.

Sunoo pointed at the small tv hanging above the counter, which usually showed the morning news. Confused, Heeseung looked up at the tv, it showed a press conference of some kind, it seemed to have just started, as the people were still walking up to the stage. He was about to ask Sunoo what this was about, when the younger shrieked again and pointed to the tv once more.

Annoyed, Heeseung looked up again and almost dropped the sandwich he was holding. In the sea of people and camera’s he could make out one all too familiar face. Jongseong was being guided to the stage, and Heeseung couldn’t keep his eyes off of him. Once he stood in front of the microphone, Heeseung gulped.

The younger looked stunning, the suit he was wearing fit him perfectly, and his hair was parted, falling in soft waves over his face. Heeseung looked in awe at the screen, and the rest crowded around him as well.

They listened to the conference diligently. Heeseung couldn’t help the smile blossoming on his face from seeing Jongseong again, but also from the project he was organizing. He couldn’t believe the younger would spend his resources on his scrummy neighborhood, but he was glad nonetheless.

His ears perked up at a certain question that was asked, and he reluctantly raised his head. He felt nervous. _Did he even feel the same? Or was this just nothing-_

_“Yes, yes there is.”_

The smile that blossomed turned into a grin now, as he anticipated what came next. He heard the reporter ask who _she_ was, and both of them scoffed in unison.

_“He is someone very special to me. He helped me out when I had nowhere to go, and he has taught me so many valuable lessons, without even knowing it himself.”_

Heeseung teared up again, he missed the younger, he really did, and he was furious with himself for not listening to him, instead running away like a coward.

_“I did something I’m not proud of when I was there, and I really hope he is watching this right now, because I’m sorry, Heeseung-hyung. I’m sorry I lied to you and I’m sorry I broke your trust. If you’d let me, I’d love to win it back again.”_

He couldn’t keep it inside anymore, the sobs coming out of his body. He covered his mouth with his hand, and the others tried consolidating him once more, but Heeseung knew he wanted Jongseong here, he _needed_ him here.

\---------------------------------------------------------

Jay and Jungwon talked, the two of them sitting in Jay’s room, the older fumbling with the bow on the teddy bear, _Heeseung’s_ teddy bear.

“Gosh hyung, you must really like him then to be like this? You never got hung up over someone in school before.” Jungwon said, laying down on Jay’s bed.

Jay whined, “This isn’t being _hung up_ Jungwonnie, I’ve gotten so used to his presence that I just- I just miss having him around! I-I miss him.”

He whispered the last part, hugging the bear closer to his body.

Jungwon sat up straight again, and looked at Jay with furrowed brows, “Yah, who even is this? This is not the Jay hyung I know, if you miss him so much, go and tell him.”

Jay thought it over, _should he?_ The older probably didn’t even want to see his face again, and he would most likely just embarrass himself, but if he did that while looking at Heeseung’s face again, he was willing to risk it.

“Thank Jungwon-ah, I owe you one!” Jay quickly put on his shoes and ran out of the room, leaving Jungwon behind.

“Tsk, you owe me more than one hyung.”

\-----------------------------------------------------

He asked their driver to bring him to the suburbs this time, not wanting to wait on the bus. He played it off as needing to see the neighborhood for the project, his leg bouncing at the thought of seeing Heeseung, if he even wanted to see him.

They arrived, Jay telling the driver he would take the bus back, and that he didn’t have to wait for him. The driver reluctantly agreed, before going back to the city.

Jay didn’t know where to go, he felt like he did a week ago, when he ran away and didn’t know the suburbs at all. Feeling a bit more confident this time, he headed to the skate park first. He turned the corner excitingly, only to be met with no one.

It felt deserted, the other times he was there it was crowded with people laughing and having fun, and although there were still some people here, _his_ people weren’t.

Dejectedly he walked to their spot, closing his eyes and just sitting down for a while. A couple of minutes passed, and Jay was about to go to the convenience store next, when he heard a familiar high pitched voice.

Niki ran around the corner, Jake following suit on his skateboard. Sunghoon and Sunoo were talking together, when the last person came around the corner. He still looked ethereal as always, wearing a purple beanie with a blue hoodie this time. The colors really shouldn’t match, but Heeseung made everything look good.

The group seemed to notice someone sitting in their spot, and Jake was about to tell them off, when he noticed who it was. Jay scrambled to stand up, dusting himself off to look busy, when his eyes met Heeseung’s. The rest looked like they felt the tension, and dispersed around the skate park, leaving Jay and Heeseung alone.

Being here, and seeing the older Jay didn’t know what to say anymore. He practiced what he should say during the drive here, but it all felt too artificial, which was the complete opposite of his feelings.

Jay cleared his throat, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, please,” Heeseung responded immediately, “I-I was unreasonable, I didn’t even hear you out.”

Jay felt awful, why was the older so understanding? He should be furious with him. “You weren’t unreasonable at all hyung, I should’ve been honest from the start, and it was totally wrong of me to assume you would immediately hate me when you know I was from the city….you don’t...you don’t hate me, right?”

He had to ask, he wouldn’t leave here knowing that the older hated him, he couldn’t.

Heeseung chuckled, and scuffed his shoe across the pavement, “No I don’t hate you, was I a bit upset with you? Yeah of course, but...I saw the press conference, and I realized that you taught me so much as well, probably without realising it yourself.”

Jay smiled, _he saw it_. “I guess we’re both at fault then?”

“Yeah, I guess we are.” Heeseung said.

Without knowing once again, they had gravitated closer to each other, mirroring that night at the bridge, even though the teddy bear was missing.

Jay could feel the olders breath on his face again, and not wanting to be interrupted this time, he swiftly closed the gap.

The olders lips were soft, and molded perfectly against his own. Heeseung quickly recovered from his shock, putting his hands on Jay’s hips, the latter putting his own on Heeseung’s shoulders.

When they parted, Jay felt out of breath. He was dizzy, not only from kissing the older, but from seeing Heeseung’s lips puffy and colored red. He was about to lean in again, the older feeling like some type of drug to him, he couldn’t get enough, when someone whistled across the ramp.

Jay groaned, being interrupted _yet_ again, when he saw Jake and Sunghoon snickering, “Yah! There are children here, get a room or something!” Jake hollered before running off, Sunghoon following suit, not before shooting Heeseung a thumbs up.

Heeseung snickered, turning the youngers head back to face him again. He smiled at him, running his thumb across Jay's cheek before asking, “Were you waiting for long, _Jay-ah?”_

Jay felt like he could die peacefully now, hearing the older say his name with adoration this time, he put his forehead against the older, pecking him on the lips quickly.

_“I’d wait forever for you, hyung.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EEK! thank you so much for reading this story, it was such a step out of my comfort zone since i usually write one shots, but i really enjoyed writing this!! do let me know what you thought abt it and im always up for constructive feedback (or kudos hehe)

**Author's Note:**

> HHH i really didn't plan on making this a series but I thought it would be way to long for a oneshot, this might be like maybe 5 chapters long? 
> 
> do let me know what you think about it! :3  
> and thanks for reading <3


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